Being ignored by my regional druid, lack of any real solitary support, and the endless hatred and bashing that continues on the lists with little more than a verbal warning has left a horrible taste in my mouth for this organization. It's not for me, clearly.

I appreciate those who befriended me, thank you. However, my path now leads elsewhere.

If you are interested in maintaining contact with me, please leave a comment.

Farewell, and bright blessings.

Not really ADF related, but it's religion-related so I thought I would share this here.

Every so often, Evangelist preachers come to my campus and publicly condemn mankind in the quad and such. Most everyone, including me, ignores their hateful speeches.

But today, I saw something different. A man, presumedly a youth pastor, had a crowd of about 50 people gathered around him in the quad. He wasn't preaching hate and intolerance like the other pastors were, instead, he was talking about loving and respecting your fellow man, and showing kindness, not hate, towards those who are not Christian.

I thought that was a radical, and very welcome shift, and I felt moved by it, especially by the number of people that had gathered around this man. It also makes me sad at the same time...I'm not Christian, but aren't love and acceptance ideals that the teachings of Jesus are supposed to spread? Most people, unfortunately, don't seem to think so, and it hurts me deeply when I see people being abused or looked down upon, both in the news and locally, for not being "true Christians" or not even Christian to begin with, especially since I was raised in a Christian household that showed me to be kind to others, no matter what they believe in, or if they were gay/trans/etc, or had a different color of skin.

It makes me wonder...were those people moved, as I was? Did even just one person see the world differently, after hearing this man's words? I would hope so, but maybe I hope for too much, in this day and age...

She keeps poking at me. I think it's time I did a ritual to honor her, but I can't find any really good sources on things she likes, besides the typical "give her shinies" type thing.

Getting the other offerings for the rest of the ritual might get complicated as well...I don't care for beer, so I'm not sure what else would work in it's place.

I'm trying to find mead as well, but nobody around here has any, and my state doesn't allow ordering liquor of any kind online. This stinks. :/

This will be my first High Day celebration, and I would like to do it in a Norse fashion. But I'm at a bit of a loss...it seems that according to some sources, Maitag involves faerie fires and playing tricks on people, so it is much more like Halloween in that respect. Others say it is purely a fertility festival. Which is true?

I'm also trying to figure out how to adapt the Maitag group ritual posted on ADF, but I'm not sure how to go about it...modifying it is tougher than I originally expected.

Though after some further insight, it seems that the idea of Maitag being more of a trickster holiday actually came from ADF itself. I had to make sure someone didn't just make it up and post it on the internet, as people are wont to do. :P

I stumbled off the path for a while, but now I have my motivation back. I want to see it through. I feel it is something I need to do, moreso than ever.

I have had a realization that going down the Dedicant path is vital to my spiritual growth, as well as my healing process. I've had to deal with a lot of emotional trauma in the months between this post and the last, and working through the program, I feel, is part of my recovery, and part of becoming whole again.

It's Brighid that's telling me to do this, I can feel it inside my heart. And Freyja too.

I feel safe, and warm.

It feels good to be back...

Even though I haven't recieved my info in the mail yet, I went and looked at the Dedicant reading list to pick out which ones I would like to read, and to my surprise, pretty much all the ones I would want to read are available at my university's library.
I picked out:

Indo-European Studies: Comparative Mythology
Hearth Culture: Celtic Heritage (though I would also like to read the Poetic and Prose Eddas)
Modern Paganism: Drawing Down the Moon (I had my own copy, but loaned it out and never saw it again. :P)

The library does have slightly older versions of some titles than what is currently available on Amazon, but I don't think that is a major concern.

I'll probably go pick up Comparative Mythology first, then go from there.

This will be a journal dedicated to my explorations of ADF, or Ár nDraíocht Féin.  I just joined, so I should be getting all my stuff for the Dedicant program in the mail soon.  When I do, I'll start posting my thoughts and experiences here.